


A Christmas mess

by CatelynStark956



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: God i hope i didn’t forget someone, Multi, i don't know why i used so many characters, writing this was hell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:47:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 21,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28268613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CatelynStark956/pseuds/CatelynStark956
Summary: The Stark/Tully family comes together for Christmas and the mess is inevitable. But they love each other and that’s what counts
Relationships: Arya Stark/Gendry Waters, Catelyn Stark/Ned Stark, Jeyne Poole/Sansa Stark, Lysa Tully Arryn/Petyr Baelish, Robb Stark/Jeyne Westerling, Satin Flowers/Jon Snow
Comments: 4
Kudos: 41





	A Christmas mess

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I’m gonna give you a little task before you start reading. In this there are two sweaters that I have described very vaguely, the reason for that is that I didn’t feel like I could do them justice. So just imagine the ugliest fucking things you have ever seen. That was all, thank you

**Catelyn**

“Good morning, my love.”

She stretched and opened her eyes. Found that Ned was already up and standing by her bedside.He had always been an early riser, she despised mornings. She was used to waking up and finding that he had been awake for an hour. Though sometimes when he woke early he would wake her too and they would take advantage of that everyone else were still sleeping. Those were her favorite mornings.

He held a cup of what she suspected was coffee. She could feel the scent, rather than actually seeing what it was. And she immediately felt how much she needed a cup of coffee.

“Is that for me?” she asked, her voice still hoarse with sleep.

“No” he scoffed. “It’s mine.”

Charming smiles were very hard when you were half asleep, but Catelyn attempted her very best.

“Can I have some anyway?”

“Well, when you ask like that I’m not sure if I can refuse you.”

“I love you.”

He sat on her bedside as she crawled into a sitting position and eagerly accepted the cup. Catelyn was a wandering parenting cliche, and she was aware of it, but she could barely function without coffee in the mornings. She had five kids and worked full time, she could be forgiven for her caffeine addiction.

Ned pulled her close to him and kissed the top of her head.

“Merry Christmas.”

“More importantly, happy anniversary” she replied.

They had met at a Christmas party hosted by Robert Baratheon twenty three years earlier. And oh what a mess it had been, but she was very happy with how it turned out in the end. That night had involved getting very drunk, cheating on Brandon, and having sex in a car. And nine months later Robb had came to them.

“You’re right, that is more important” he said. “Good thing I have a gift for you.”

“You have a gift for me? I don’t have anything for you.”

They had never given each other gifts for that since it collided with Christmas.

“Well, it’s a Christmas gift as well. And my contribution to this year’s ugly sweater competition.”

Catelyn had to smile. He would definitely not win the ugly sweater competition that year. She had found the most hideous sweater ever known to mankind, there was no chance of that he had found an even uglier one.

That tradition had started fifteen years earlier when she had found a Christmas sweater that was so terrible that she had to buy it for Ned. After Christmas he had bought her one and then they had argued over which one that was the ugliest. And since that they had given one to each other as a Christmas gift every year and let the rest of the family decide which one were uglier. The one who had bought the ugliest one won. They had a very impressive collection at that point. And they were committed to it.

Catelyn had lost the previous three years due to that everything went so terribly with her hair. That was Ned’s trick. But she would win that year. She was sure of it.

“You will have to wait until tonight, because yours is wrapped and under the tree.”

“I can’t wait to win.”

“You won’t win, Ned. I could barely stand to look at mine, it’s awful.”

“Just wait and see.”

Ned left her on the bed with the coffee and disappeared into the wardrobe. She reached for her glasses, it would be nice to properly see what Ned had for her.

He came back with a monstrosity. And of course it went terribly with her hair. Sometimes she wanted to curse his ability to see exactly which colors looked good on her and which did not. Okay, not very often, it was actually only around Christmas. The rest of the year she loved it.

“Did you make a deal with a demon to get that?” she asked.

She was still sure of that she would win, but the thought of having to wear that thing for even five minutes was almost unbearable.

“I did sell my soul, but it’s better if you don’t ask questions” he said. “Catch!”

He tossed the sweater at her and she pulled a face as she caught it.

“Thank you, love.”

She put the coffee cup on her bedside table and held up the sweater in front of her so that she could have a look at it. There was some sort of animal at the back. If she squinted at it she could almost see a cat. But she wasn’t sure of that it was a cat, it could have been anything. Was it even an animal?

“An ugly cat for my very beautiful Cat.”

Catelyn glanced at the clock that stood next to the cup on her bedside table. There was still half an hour left before they had to get up and make breakfast for the small army that had gathered in their house. Ned had to be well aware of that he had woken her earlier than he had to. And she absolutely had an idea of how they could spend that half hour.

“I haven’t had a kiss” she said.

“Would you like a kiss?”

“Come here and kiss me.”

“Gladly.”

She put aside the sweater and laid her hands on his shoulders, pulling him closer as he leaned down and kissed her.

“We don’t need to get up yet” she mumbled.

“No” he said.

He trailed kisses along her jaw and pushed her back on the soft mattress. She couldn’t keep herself from moaning when his lips found her pulse.

“Quiet, my love, there are many people in the house.”

The sensation of his hot breath on her skin sent a shiver down her spine. He was right. They had to try to be quiet. But it was very hard as his hands moved in under her shirt and ran along her body.

“Just give me a moment” she said and pushed him away.

He impatiently waited as she took off her glasses and put them on the bedside table again. She didn’t want to be forced to think about them while having her husband. And then she pulled her shirt over her head. That left her with her underwear.

As soon as she was done with that he pulled her to him again, pressing his lips against hers. He pushed her to her back once more and kissed her neck. His teeth scraped her skin lightly, a teasing promise.

“I hate you” she breathed.

“I can make you feel so good, all you need to do is to be quiet. You can do that, can’t you?”

It was torture. Having to struggle to be quiet while he kissed his way down her neck and chest was torture. She whimpered lightly when he took one of her nipples into his mouth, he punished her by drawing away from her.

“Nooooo” Catelyn whined. “I’ll be quiet, I promise.”

Sometimes she hated that it took him less than a minute to make her so desperate that she was ready to beg. Her comfort in those moments was that she had the same effect on him.

“You shouldn’t make promises you don’t intend to keep.”

As he said that he ran a hand down her thigh and pulled her underwear down her legs, leaving her completely naked before him. Then he pushed her legs apart. Though he moved his hand up and placed it on her hip instead. That was very much not where she wanted him. When she shifted he just pulled his hand away completely.

“Will you be quiet for me?”

The way he looked at her with eyes foggy with his own need was driving her crazy. She was already aching, couldn’t he just get on with it? He wanted it, she could see it so clearly. He was just teasing.

“Just wait until it’s your turn. I’m gonna end you.”

“I look forward to it very much, but that was not an answer.”

He leaned down and kissed her just below the navel. Once more she couldn’t stop herself from squirming, trying to get him where she needed him to be, and once more he pulled away from her.

“I’ll do whatever you want. Please, Ned.”

He smiled at her for a moment and then he finally got to work. And she had to bite her tongue in order not to moan when he put his mouth to her. With one hand she grabbed at the sheets, the other she had in Ned’s hair. She desperately tried to hold on to the thought that she had to be quiet. But coherent thinking was incredibly hard when Ned was using every little trick he knew to make her come undone. He knew them all so well. He knew exactly what he had to do. And oh how she loved him for it.

In the end she managed to hold back a cry of his name as she climaxed. It left her breathless and for a moment she could do was pant.

“Good girl.”

“I hate you so much.”

“No, you don’t.”

“No, I don’t.”

**Catelyn**

”Breakfast!” she shouted.

And within seconds she could hear a stampede that could only be caused by her family moving through the house.

”Merry Christmas, Mom” Robb said when he sprinted into the room and threw himself down in his chair around the large table in the dining room.

They always served all meals in the dining room, that was a lot more enjoyable than eating in the kitchen. Good thing they had a large table considering all the guests.

She liked having all of her family in one place since it had became a rare happening. It was cozy just having them all together for a while. It seemed like they were all slipping away from her in some way or another, but having them with her again made that feeling go away, even if it was just for a little while.

”Good morning, Robb” she said. ”Merry Christmas.”

Robb’s girlfriend Jeyne slipped into the room, very much more silent than her boyfriend.

”Oh, all of this looks lovely, Mrs. Stark” she said and smiled.

She held back a yawn, forced a smile upon her face and took Jeyne’s compliment. It wasn’t the poor girl’s fault that Catelyn wasn’t a morning person. She would have much preferred to stay in bed longer, spending more time with Ned before they had to get up and get everything prepared for the arrival of the guests. He had given her a very pleasant start to that day, but she wished it could have been longer.

”Thank you, Jeyne” she said as Jeyne took her seat next to Robb. “But I have to admit my husband did most of it. He’s a lot better than me at cooking.”

”It tastes lovely too” Robb said, his mouth stuffed with scrambled eggs.

”And it smells lovely” a sweet voice said.

Catelyn turned around and saw Sansa and the other Jeyne come into the room, hand in hand.

”Thank you, Jeyne” Catelyn said once more and smiled.

”Merry Christmas, Mom” Sansa said and led Jeyne Poole to their chairs.

”Merry Christmas, Sansa.”

Sansa had became so much happier since she got together with her girlfriend Jeyne, and that made Catelyn happy. Her daughter had seemed so sad when she visited home after she had left for college, but after she got together with Jeyne Poole, her life had seemed to change for the better. They had been friends since they were little girls, Jeyne had been at their house often. And Catelyn only wanted for her children to be happy. That was all she wished for in life, a happy family. So she was glad to accept whatever made Sansa happy. Though she had to admit to herself that things sometimes got a bit confused because her girlfriend had the same name as Robb’s girlfriend.

She was just about to walk over and sit down in her own chair when Jon, Theon, Satin, Bran, Rickon and Arya came racing into the room with some of the dogs just behind. Shoving each other out of the way and trying to make the others fall on the way to their seats. Rickon almost flew into the table, and for a second Catelyn worried for that they would destroy all of the breakfast, but he managed to stop himself. She could just look at the children, too horrified to get out a word.

”I WON!” Arya shouted when she reached her chair first. ”SUCKERS!”

”NO, I WAS FIRST!” Rickon shrieked.

”Liars, I was first” Bran said, a little calmer than the first two.

”We all know that I was first” Jon, Satin and Theon said in chorus.

All of them laughed, even Robb, Jeyne, Sansa and Jeyne Poole. And in that moment, Catelyn thought of burning all of their gifts in the fireplace.

But before she had time to gather herself enough to scold them into the next week, she felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her, and a smile spread on her face again. In a second, she forgot about the terrible behavior of her kids and had relaxed into his touch.

”Merry Christmas, light and love of my life” Ned whispered. “You truly are beautiful this morning. Though you are always beautiful.”

He stroke her hair aside and nuzzled her neck. His beard tickled her and sent a pleasant shiver down her spine. She liked the feeling of his hot breath against her skin.

“You have said that already” she chuckled and stroke his arms. “Twice.”

He had said it once in the kitchen too, when they were making breakfast.

”You look radiant, it’s weird I have not said it more than twice.”

She laughed and turned her head so that they could kiss on the lips, but they barely had time to brush their lips against each other before some of the people around the table started to make a fuss about it.

”Mom. Dad. Please don’t make out in front of my sandwich” Arya said and made a disgusted face.

”I am very much allowed to kiss my husband in my own house” Catelyn said and gave Ned a kiss.

Rickon and Bran just made gagging noises over their yoghurt. Robb had frozen while pouring himself a glass of juice, just staring at Catelyn and Ned. Sansa coughed and held her gaze steadily at the table. Jon seemed very keen on getting the butter on his toast exactly even. Arya kept her disgusted face on. Jeyne W, Theon, Satin and Jeyne P seemed completely unaffected though, they just went on with eating what they had put on their plates and talking to each other.

Clearly the children, who had been made from their love, didn’t appreciate it very much. Catelyn watched them show affection to their significant others all the time. They could take a little affection between their parents. Or, in Jon’s case, a bit of affection between his aunt and uncle. He had chosen to come directly to their place instead of going to Lyanna first and then arriving with her. He had missed his cousins a lot, they were like the brothers and sisters that he didn’t have.

”Tell me again, why didn’t we stop at two or three kids like normal couples do?” Catelyn sighed and glared at their children as they took their places at the table.

He put a hand just above her knee, and the smile returned to her lips.

”We had a lot of fun with making them” he whispered and his hand slid further up her leg.

Catelyn was more than a little horrified with that he had said that at a table with their children, even though she was pretty sure that she had been the only one to hear him.

”Eddard Stark!” she exclaimed and slapped his arm. ”Behave!”

And as she said that, Satin started laughing. That distracted both Catelyn and Ned from what he had said, and they looked at him. Why was he laughing at them? Satin hid his face in Jon’s shoulder and Catelyn gazed around the table to find everyone quiet, their eyes darting between Catelyn and Satin.

”I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be disrespectful. It’s an honor that you invited me into to your home for the holiday, it really is, and it’s so lovely getting to meet Jon’s family” he rambled as an apology. ”But... is your name Eddard?”

Ned looked really confused for a second before he replied. ”Yes?”

And Catelyn managed to connect the dots. Satin had never heard anyone call Ned ’Eddard’. He and Jon had only been together for a few months, he had met Lyanna quite many times. Lyanna liked the boy a lot, but that was the first time he had met the rest of them. It seemed logical that he didn’t know his real name was ’Eddard’, since everyone always called him ’Ned’.

”It’s only Eddard when he’s in trouble” Arya stated through a mouthful of toast with jam.

”It’s only Eddard when he’s on bad terms with Mom” Bran said and Arya shrugged.

Theon muttered something under his breath that made Robb choke on his juice, and he spat it out over the table. Over the white table cloth with pretty embroidery that Catelyn had inherited when her mother died. She would have to wash it before the guests arrived. Great, another thing to do. If she would even be able to wash away the stains. At times she wondered what her life would have been like without her children.

”Robb!” she snapped. ”Immediately clean that up!”

”Say something to Theon too!” Robb said upset. ”He said that–”

”No. I really don’t want to hear it!!”

She had a clue about what Theon might have said. And she really wished not to hear it. She could live her life without that.

**Catelyn**

Catelyn felt like they had been cooking for Christmas since June. But it had actually just been a day. She couldn’t remember why she had insisted on that she and Ned should host the Christmas dinner. But she had done it, and she was very close to regretting it. Not truly, she couldn’t regret anything that brought her family together, but still. It was painstakingly boring, and she had been reminded of why Ned usually did most of the cooking. It was because she hated cooking.

Ned was out buying the last things that they needed and the children avoided the kitchen like it was the plague. She was pretty sure of that Arya and Bran weren’t even at home. The only company she had was Summer, Bran’s dog. Not even the other dogs wanted to spend time with her despite that she had food.

And suddenly the doorbell rang, a choir of barking dogs was all she could hear and Summer dashed out of the room. It was hours until the guests would arrive, so she immediately got curious. She dried her hands on her apron and went out in the hallway to open the door. But before she could reach her goal, she had to wrestle her way through a crowd of six large dogs that were jumping and barking. She was ungodly tired of the dogs and she daily questioned why she had just accepted it when Benjen came to them with five puppies because his dog had a litter and he didn’t have place for all of them. When she finally managed to get hold of the door handle she was surprised to find Ned’s sister outside in the snow.

”I know I’m a bit early” Lyanna said and smiled as the dogs jumped up at her. ”And I’m sorry, but I thought I could help with everything and talk a bit. I haven’t seen you in a while, Tully.”

Bless Lyanna Stark.

”I’m so glad you’re here” Catelyn said and pulled Lyanna into a hug. ”I’m all alone in the kitchen, I could use some company.”

”I don’t understand how you do this” Lyanna laughed. ”I would have broken.”

”You can’t even imagine how close I am to a breakdown.”

”Merry Christmas.”

Catelyn showed Lyanna to the kitchen and put her to work with chopping vegetables. If she had came early, she would have to help. But Catelyn hoped that the other guests would come at six like they had said. She wanted no more surprises until she was done with fixing at least most of it all.

”Where do you have my brother and the kids?” Lyanna asked. “And where’s my son?”

”I sent your brother to shop the last things we need and the kids mysteriously disappear every time I mention that I could use a hand in the kitchen” Catelyn told her. “I think Satin wanted to help, but Jon talked him out of it.”

”They have reached the age where girlfriends and boyfriends are more fun than casseroles” Lyanna laughed. “I’m sorry for Jon.”

Catelyn chuckled.

”I don’t blame him, right now I feel like everything is more fun than casseroles.”

She could hear the door open and close. No doorbell, luckily, so the dogs didn’t go mad. No one in the family ever used the doorbell.

”I think Ned’s back” she said to Lyanna.

Finally Ned was home with more eggs and milk, it had taken him quite some time. She walked out into the hallway to help him carry everything into the kitchen only to find Arya. And Gendry, Arya’s friend. At least Arya insisted on that he was just a friend. Gendry was there more often than not, Catelyn knew him well.

”Gendry will have dinner with us, I hope that’s okay” Arya said.

She looked very guilty for some reason. Like she had been caught doing something she wasn’t allowed to do.

”Of course. The more, the merrier” Catelyn smiled. ”Welcome, Gendry.”

The boy had a difficult foster family. He could stay for as long as he wanted, Catelyn wouldn’t be the one to send him home. He deserved to celebrate Christmas in a stable home.

”Thank you, Mrs. Stark” Gendry said.

”Your aunt is in the kitchen if you want to say hello” Catelyn told Arya.

”Which one of them?” Arya asked.

Catelyn sighed. She knew that her own sister was a bit... hard sometimes. But that was not a very nice thing to say. She had raised her children better than that. Family was important, no matter what.

”Arya. That’s rude” she said strictly.

”So it’s Lysa?”

”No. It’s Lyanna” Catelyn sighed.

Arya only smiled and almost ran towards the kitchen. Lyanna acted like a second mother to Catelyn’s second daughter. Catelyn was about to follow her when Gendry spoke.

”I am so thankful for that you let me be here, Mrs. Stark” he mumbled.

Poor boy. It ached a little in Catelyn’s heart when he looked at her like she was truly the kindest person in the world for letting him have Christmas dinner with them. Like it wasn’t the natural thing to do.

”I want you to know that our doors are always open for you” she said softly. ”You can come here whenever you want to, you don’t need to ask.”

”That means a lot” he said.

She smiled.

”Merry Christmas, Gendry” she said before she went back go the kitchen.

She almost collided with Arya in the doorway.

”What did you say to him?” Arya hissed.

Arya really mistrusted her and Ned around Gendry. Like they would ruin it all on purpose. Catelyn just wanted her children and their girlfriends and boyfriends to be happy, she would not ruin anything.

”Nothing that will send him running, I promise you” she told her daughter.

Arya gave her narrow eyes and she almost laughed.

”You can ask him” she smiled and stroke Arya’s cheek before she went into the kitchen.

Lyanna looked at her curiously when she entered and almost tripped over Nymeria, Arya’s dog, before she went back to Christmas cooking. Now there were two dogs in the kitchen, begging for scraps. She couldn’t stand the begging.

”What did you say to him, Tully?” Lyanna asked.

Catelyn laughed.

”I told him that our doors are always open for him.”

”Are you taking in another stray?”

Maybe that was exactly what Catelyn was doing, she had not thought about it. She just knew that if Gendry wanted to come to them she would welcome him with open arms.

Theon Greyjoy had been practically living with them since he was little. It had never been official, but he had spent more time at their place than in his own home. His father and his brothers definitely had their shares of bad habits, his father had even been in prison for a while. During that period his older sister Asha had also often sat at their table when Catelyn came home from work. Though she had moved away from their town the moment she could and had made a better life for herself, bless the brave girl.

”The one I have has moved out. He’s growing up. I need a new one” Catelyn said with a smile.

”You know what I think? I think you want one that doesn’t give you sex toys for Christmas” Lyanna said and looked at her.

Catelyn sighed deeply. Last Christmas she had got a gift from Theon for the first time. He had said it was a thank you for how kind it had been of Ned and her to take care of him all those years even though he wasn’t their child. He had also said that it was something both of them could enjoy. She had opened it, all happy and unknowing, only to realize that the box didn’t contain something entirely appropriate. She would never forget the way her father and sister had looked at her. And how everyone else had laughed while she blushed like a maniac. For long she had wanted to sink through the floor just thinking about it. She probably would have taken it better if her father had not been there. He had not been too happy. And her sister had been furious. At Ned, of all people, who was completely free of blame in that situation.

”Oh may the gods have mercy with me. There is a gift under the tree from him to me this year too. I fear he’s starting a tradition” she said, almost shivering at the thought of it. ”I love the boy. But he tends to sexualize things.”

Lyanna was laughing so that she was crying. Catelyn allowed herself to smile a little. It had been fun afterwards, but when it happened she had wanted to die. And she expected that she would have to go through it another time. She hoped that she could do it with a little more dignity that time around. At least she was prepared.

”I take it you haven’t used his gift” Lyanna gasped.

Catelyn had refused to open the box. She didn’t even know where it was, she had forgotten where she had put it. Probably deep down in a drawer in the bedroom, but she wasn’t sure.

”No, I haven’t” she told Lyanna. ”He’s like my son, what do you think of me?”

”You do have those five kids, Cat.”

Catelyn suddenly remembered what Ned had said at breakfast. He had been right, even though it was a highly inappropriate thing to say at a breakfast table.

”And I didn’t make them with toys” Catelyn simply stated.

”You get good sex.”

Five kids and more than twenty years of marriage later, she still got good sex. Catelyn Stark could complain about a bunch of things, but the way her husband loved her behind closed doors wasn’t one of them.

”Is he the best of my brothers?”

Catelyn never would have been able to talk about her own brother that way. But she was thankful for that Lyanna was so relaxed. Few people were that easy to talk to. She really appreciated that she could talk that way to Lyanna.

”Well, I’ve only tried two of them. And I’m not allowed to say anything other than Ned. But it’s definitely Ned” Catelyn said.

”Don’t tell Brandon. You will hurt his feelings” Lyanna giggled.

”Maybe he’s gotten better, I don’t know. I’m not going to look it up.”

”Someone should tell him that he wasn’t nearly as good as he thought he was.”

”I fucked his younger brother and then married him. I think that is statement enough from my side.”

Brandon was a necessary part of her past and she just had to accept that. No matter how much she hated it at times. Quite often, actually. About every time he opened his mouth.

”He still stares at my ass sometimes though, so maybe not” she added.

”He’s impossible” Lyanna sighed.

”Oh absolutely.”

**Lyanna**

Lyanna was placed on top of the kitchen island with a wine glass in her hand. Her brother was at the stove, making sauce for the meat. His wife had left the kitchen to take a phone call. Lyanna’s nieces, nephews and her son were nowhere to be seen. She had only seen Arya and some dogs. Maybe they would come down once the other guests started to arrive. She had missed them a lot but she wouldn’t force her company upon them. Some of them were already adults. Her son was already an adult. He had grown so fast.

It was also really damn hot in the kitchen, Lyanna was almost sweating.

”I know that, Lysa. But I’m your sister, I don’t want you to make a mistake that makes you unhappy!” Catelyn said sharply as she came back inside. ”Think of your son!”

Lyanna could hear Catelyn’s sister scream at her through the phone when she held it out on an arm’s length from her ear. She looked so incredibly tired that Lyanna felt bad for her. The woman needed some wine. So she jumped down from the counter and poured her sister-in-law a glass of red wine.

”Of course you’re still welcome” Catelyn sighed and brought the phone back to her ear when the volume was down on not deafening again.

Lyanna handed her the glass, Catelyn smiled at her briefly as she took it, but quickly that tired look was back.

”Okay then. Good, I’ll see you in an hour. Bye.”

Lyanna watched her hang up, put her phone on the counter and then chug her glass of wine. All of it. Every single drop was gone when Catelyn put the glass down again a few seconds later.

”You’ll be passed out drunk in in an hour if you continue like this, love” Ned said.

”My sister got married last week” she explained. ”To Petyr Baelish. He will be joining us tonight.”

Ned just looked at her for a few seconds. Then he also poured himself a glass of wine.

”Why don’t we invite the Targaryens while we’re on it?” he muttered.

Lyanna did fully understand why they looked so dead inside. She had never met Baelish, but she had heard of him. And it had never been anything that implied that he had any interest at all in Catelyn’s sister. It seemed more like he had quite an interest in Catelyn. And she had a whole lot of stories about him, he had been a friend of hers when they were children. Ned also had a lot of stories about him, he just hated his guts.

”I don’t know what to do” Catelyn said as she filled her glass again. ”Petyr doesn’t love Lysa. Not even a little. Why can’t she see that?”

”He’s never felt anything for her at all” Ned said.

”Is Littlefinger coming here?”

Lyanna turned and saw Sansa in the doorway. She looked upset. A brunette with lovely brown eyes stood behind her, looking equally upset. That must have been Jeyne Poole, Sansa’s girlfriend.

”I didn’t know about it until just now” Catelyn said. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

Sansa looked at the bottle on the counter and then back at her mom, who was urgently sipping wine.

”You can have one glass if you want to” Catelyn said and then raised the glass to her lips again.

”He owns a bar in town, he is not the most pleasant man” Sansa told Lyanna as she poured wine for herself and her girlfriend.

”He’s acted really creepy towards some of our friends one time” Jeyne added.

”Why are you letting this man into your house?” Lyanna asked Catelyn.

Catelyn was nervously tapping her fingers against her glass. She had not finished it, maybe she was too nervous to even drink more.

”Because he is my sister’s husband, no matter what we have to say about it” she mumbled. ”Even if I would have liked it if Lysa had told me about it earlier.”

The clinking sounds coming from her hands increased in speed when her daughter left the kitchen again. Her lips was pressed tightly together, and she stared out into the air. That was probably the closest thing to a breakdown Lyanna had ever seen her have. She was always so calm and collected.

”Oh gods, she’s so stupid!” she exclaimed after a while of silence. ”She’s so damn stupid! Why decide to not tell us until they are on their way here? Dad will be so angry. And Edmure and Uncle Brynden, as well.”

Lyanna walked over to her and took the glass. Catelyn would probably have crushed it if she had held it for another minute.

”Because she is smart enough to know that you don’t like her decisions and that you don’t want him here. This way, you can’t deny them” Lyanna said and put the glass on the counter.

She noticed how her sister-in-law glanced at it nervously.

Then a shriek could be heard from upstairs and Catelyn looked like she was about to actually break in the middle.

”What have they done now?” she whispered.

”Do we even want to know?” Ned asked.

“Probably not.”

And in the moment Lyanna actually considered having more children. It seemed like it kept you on you toes, you never knew what was coming for you. Ned and Catelyn looked like they were having so much fun with the chaotic force they called their five children. Ned just stared out into empty air and Catelyn was on the verge of tears. Then Robb stormed into the kitchen with a bunch of papers in one hand. He also seemed to be on the verge of tears.

”What is this?” he shouted.

He didn’t sound angry, more like he had seen a ghost actually.

”You tell us” Catelyn said. ”It just looks like paper.”

Robb took one of the papers and held it up so that they could see more clearly. It was a drawing, a sketch. A very displaying sketch. Of Catelyn. It was a nude sketch of Catelyn. The first thing that struck Lyanna was that his brother was lucky to have such a beautiful wife, because Catelyn was still very beautiful despite having passed forty.

The second thing that struck her was how incredibly ashamed her brother and his wife looked, she couldn’t help but laugh at it. She had never seen her brother blush the way he did, he blushed so much that he had to turn his back to Jon.

”How come I’ve known you all my life and still didn’t know you could draw, big brother?” Lyanna chuckled.

Ned really didn’t strike her as an artist, but it was a very good drawing. Lyanna would have looked closer at it if it had not been of her extremely uncomfortable sister-in-law. Perhaps Ned had some drawings that were not of his naked wife, she would have to ask him later.

”What exactly made you think that you had the right to go through the drawers in our bedroom?” Catelyn said strictly.

The effectiveness of her strict mom voice was ruined a bit by the fact that she had turned so red that her face matched her hair.

”Give me those!” she said and snatched the papers out of Robb’s hand when he did not answer.

”We were looking for a flashlight!” Robb said defensively.

”And you thought I would have one in my bedside table?” Ned asked.

He was still turned away from them.

”We thought that out of all of us you were most likely to have one!”

Well, yes. Had Lyanna been asked which one of the Tully-Starks that had a flashlight she would have said Ned, obviously. Had she been asked which one of the Tully-Starks that could draw really well and used that talent to make steamy art of their significant other she wouldn’t have said Ned, obviously. She would have guessed Theon. And if he didn’t count, Robb. Her guesses would have been hilariously wrong.

”Wait. We?” Catelyn asked and her eyes grew wide. ”Who else saw that?”

”Satin, Jon, Jeyne, Sansa, Sansa’s Jeyne, Arya and Gendry” Jon informed his mother.

That seemed to be pretty much everyone except for Bran and Rickon.

”Bingo” Catelyn sighed.

”Oh, and Theon.”

And Lyanna started laughing so much that she had to hold back tears. Theon would never let them forget it and that made all of it even better. If it hadn’t been the best thing that Lyanna had ever witnessed before, it certainly was now.

”You’ll never hear the end of this!” she howled.

”We’ll never hear the end of this” Catelyn repeated with pure horror in her voice. ”Gods Ned, we’ll never hear the end of this. Theon will be unbearable. And what are the others going to think of us? Robb, please go back to them and tell them that I am terribly sorry.”

”You don’t have to say it twice” Robb said and almost ran out of the kitchen.

And in the next moment the doorbell rang. Catelyn opened the closest drawer, threw down the papers and slammed it shut.

”I’ll get it” she mumbled and disappeared to go open the door for her guests.

That was when Ned turned to Lyanna and looked at her with an expression so serious that it was easy to believe that someone had died.

”Not a word about this to anyone” he said.

”Okay.”

If the opportunity of mentioning her brother’s artistic talents came up, she would say a word about it to every person who wanted to listen. As any sane sibling would do.

“No wonder Theon turned out as he did.”

“Shut up.”

**Sansa**

They all sat in Robb’s room. Sansa and Jon were on the verge of tears. Sansa considered to climb out the window and never come back. She had not been even a little bit prepared for what she had seen. And she would never be able to look at her parents again. Good thing she had moved out and would be able to just leave to never look back once the holidays were over. Maybe she would just cut all sort of contact with her parents. Seemed reasonable. She felt bad for Arya who would have to stay in the house after seeing it. The thought of that almost made Sansa physically shudder.

”My mother would like to apologize. She says that she’s terribly sorry” Robb said as he entered the room.

He no longer had the papers. Which was a huge relief. The owner of them could keep them. Or burn them. Sansa hoped for the second.

”We should be the ones to apologize, they’ve done nothing wrong” Jeyne said. ”We were searching their drawers, this is fully on us.”

Those sketches. They were wrong. They should have been considered a sin, a slight against the gods. They should have been burning in the deepest of the seven hells.

”Is it though?” Jon said with a grimace.

”Yes. Yes it is” Jeyne said.

”I’m just surprised you didn’t see this coming” Arya said and chuckled.

”How could we possibly have seen this coming?” Sansa mumbled.

”Because our parents really like to fuck and they do it a lot, in case you hadn’t noticed. There’s a reason to why there’s five of us and they barely fight. And honestly, I expected it to be worse.”

Sansa didn’t need to hear that. Not at all, actually. She had noticed many years ago, because Mom and Dad had a hard time keeping their eyes of lust behind closed doors. She had never caught them actually in the act though. The worst was some very passionate kisses.

”Why did you expect it to be worse?” Robb asked with a frown. “Why did you expect it at all?”

Arya laughed at that.

”Because I walked in on her blowing him once, that’s how I got my sex talk. This was nothing.”

”ARYA” Jon and Robb howled.

”I want to wash my brain with bleach” Sansa said.

She would do anything to forget what she had seen.

”I almost feel bad for myself now. You know, I once came home earlier than I said I was going to do and they were straight up–”

”ARYA” Jon and Robb howled once more.

Sansa felt extremely grateful for that Arya seemed to have taken all the explicit walking in on your parents moments. Because she had actually managed to escape that and it seemed that it was the same for all her brothers. Now that she thought of it, that almost seemed a little too good, considering everything. Poor Bran and Rickon probably had it coming for them.

”Well, I think it’s sweet” Robb’s Jeyne said and smiled. “My parents don’t look at each other like that anymore.”

”’Sweet’ is not the word I would use” Jon said.

”Why are you crying?” Satin asked with an eye roll. ”It’s art! And quite sweet.”

Sansa could understand their train of thoughts. A loving partner and sex was parts of a marriage that she wanted for herself someday. Jeyne was not a bad with a pen, perhaps one day there would be drawings like that of Sansa. But seeing her mother pictured like that was deeply disturbing. Even more disturbing was the fact that her father had made it. He had seen it and decided to draw it.

”That’s our mom!” Sansa said.

“And my aunt” Jon added.

”You have four siblings, Sansa! What had you expected?” Jeyne asked. “That they fucked five times exactly and have lived like saints since they had Rickon? I hate to break it to you, but that’s not how it works.”

”Also, your dad is very good at drawing, who knew?” Theon said.

”Their mom, appearantly” Jeyne said with a smirk.

That was the worst possible thing anyone could have said. Sansa loved Jeyne, but she hated that.

”Come on, isn’t it nice that they still love each other?”

”I could have accepted it without the demonstration” Robb muttered.

”How am I the only one who has gotten a proper demonstration? Hells, I’ve had multiple.”

”That’s ’cause you don’t knock” Jon said.

”Don’t know if I count, but I got one. They don’t know about it though” Gendry spoke up.

The poor guy. Gendry was so sweet. He deserved to be spared from the sight of Sansa’s parents fucking, but it seemed like he had unfortunately seen it.

”And it’s better that way. They wouldn’t be able to look at you if they knew” Arya said. ”Dad couldn’t look at me for a week after I walked into his office to look for a pencil sharpener and he had Mom bent over the desk.”

”ARYA!”

Rickon poked his head into the room. He had a frown on his little face that looked a lot like their mother’s.

“What are you screaming about?” he asked.

“You’re too small” Robb said.

That was undoubtedly the worst thing Robb would have been able to say in that moment. Nothing made Rickon as angry as when someone called him small. Not even Mom could get away with it anymore. Even though he would always be the baby of the family.

“I’m not too small!”

“You are too small, Rickon” Sansa sighed. “Now get out.”

“No! I want to know!”

“You really don’t” Arya said.

“I do!”

Arya rolled her eyes.

“Okay, if you come with me outside I’ll tell you” Sansa said and got up on her feet.

“Are you out of your mind?” Jon said.

They were all so terribly stupid sometimes. Of corse she wouldn’t tell him. But she could let him be under the impression that he knew.

She looked at Jon for a moment, hoping that he would get it. When he continued to look back at her like she had told him that his dad had came back to get him she just gave up and walked outside with Rickon.

“You have to promise that you won’t tell Mom and Dad” she whispered.

“I promise.”

“Robb wants to marry Jeyne.”

Robb had no plans whatsoever to propose to Jeyne that she knew of. But it would be fun to let Rickon believe that, because there was a high chance of that he would tell Mom and she would absolutely lose her mind. And Robb would have to pay for it.

“That’s boring” Rickon said.

He sounded very disappointed. And without another word he went back to his room.

“Rickon thinks you’re gonna propose to Jeyne” she said casually when she went back inside. “Just so you know. And he might tell Mom and Dad.”

Jeyne Westerling started laughing when she said that. And Robb groaned and hid his face in his hands. That had not quite been the reaction she had expected.

“Have we missed something?” Arya asked.

Jeyne took Robb’s hands and brought them down from his face.

“I know we said that we would do it later, but we should tell them” she said.

“Tell us what?” Satin asked.

“We got engaged.”

Okay, yeah, Mom would definitely lose her mind.

**Catelyn**

It had been long since she last saw her brother, father and uncle, but now they were brushing snow off their clothes and coming inside. It had been quite busy at the company, it always was the month before Christmas. Her dad had been overseeing the renovation of her childhood home, where he still lived. Uncle Brynden had been traveling in Essos with his husband. Unfortunately, Rodrik had not been able to join them that night as he needed to help his nephew with moving. Poor Jory had been forced to move out from his apartment because of rodents. And Edmure had been busy with his wife. They were expecting their first child, the thought of it made Catelyn all fuzzy inside. Her baby brother was growing up and having babies of his own. He had only been twelve when she had Robb. But where was Roslin?

“Where is Roslin?”

Edmure was quiet and seemed very focused on taking off his shoes. For a moment Catelyn thought he had not heard her, but then he looked at her.

“Roslin wasn’t feeling well. She chose to stay at home and rest. The pregnancy has been hard on her.”

His tone indicated that that wasn’t the entire truth, but they could talk more about that later. Catelyn had looked forward to seeing Roslin again, and she didn’t like hearing that she wasn’t feeling well.

“The first one is hard. Poor Roslin, you’ll have to bring some food home for her. And we’ll have to call her later.”

“Yes...”

Edmure definitely wasn’t telling her everything, she had not doubt about that.

“How is the baby?”

That made Edmure light up.

“The baby is good. She’s a little kicker, just like Arya was. I can’t wait to meet her.”

“If she’s anything like Arya you’ll be up for a challenge” the Blackfish laughed. “Your sister didn’t sleep for two years.”

“And then I had two more babies, because apparently I hate sleeping.”

She loved sleeping. Could easily sleep ten hours every night if her schedule allowed it and still take naps during the days. The couch in the office next to their bedroom was her favorite place to nap. In the afternoons the sun fell on it perfectly and made it warm and very comfortable. Though she could fall asleep anywhere and Ned could testify to that.

“I want you to tell me the truth, and nothing but the truth now, Little Cat.”

“Sure.”

“How many of them were accidents?”

She had not planned a single one of her children. Robb was obviously an accident, she and Ned had not even been together when he was conceived. They had not planned Sansa, but she had been a welcome surprise. They had wanted to wait at least three years before having the next one after that, but a little more than a year after Sansa was born she found herself pregnant again. And after Arya they had said that three was more than enough. Bran came a long two years later. After that they had promised themselves that they would have no more. And that did work for about three years, then suddenly she found herself pregnant again and Rickon came to them.

“All of them, Uncle. But they don’t know that.”

“Is Lysa here yet?” Dad asked, completely ignoring the topic.

Her dad had never been fond of the chaotic start of what would become her marriage. And he was not fond of that she had not planned her kids. “That is a thing that requires preparation!” She had free-styled her way through it though and her kids had turned out just fine. Or at least she hoped so.

“No. And there is something you need to know before that” Catelyn said. “Go to the living room, I’ll be with you in a minute.”

She went back to the kitchen where Ned and Lyanna were cooking in silence.

“I need to talk to them about the whole Lysa thing, can you handle this without me for five minutes?” she said.

“Of course, do you mistrust us?” Lyanna asked.

“Ned is a hundred times better at cooking than I am, I trust him.”

“And me?”

“She shouldn’t trust you” Ned muttered.

“I see that you are handling this really well so I’m going to talk to them. My dad will have a heart attack.”

“I’m sure it will be fine, love” Ned said and looked at her.

“It won’t, but it’s sweet that you’re trying to make it better.”

Catelyn walked out to the living room where her dad, brother and uncle were waiting for her. She sat in an armchair. Where was she supposed to start? Could she just say it? Or was it better to soften the blow a bit? Why was she so nervous? It wasn’t like someone had died. Her sister had only married someone.  


“Catelyn? Has something happened?” Edmure asked.

“Have you spoken to Lysa this past week?”

The Blackfish and Edmure shook their heads, but Dad nodded.

“She did seem very cheerful. Unusually cheerful.”

Lysa had never been a very happy person. The world had screwed her over in more ways than one. And Catelyn really wanted her to be happy, the gods knew that she deserved it. But marrying Petyr had not been a good idea. It had been a terrible idea because Petyr wouldn’t make her happy. But Catelyn didn’t want to ruin anything for her. And she had no right to tell her what she could and couldn’t do. She loved her sister.

But Lysa had suffered watching both Catelyn and Edmure getting into long term relationships and it had just gotten so much worse since Edmure announced that he and Roslin would have a child. A baby girl, born within a marriage, a stable relationship. Lysa had one child, little Robert, and she had always refused to tell them who the father was. Their relationships had hurt her, badly.

“Well, I found out why just before you came.”

“Should we be worried?” the Blackfish asked with a frown.

“I... I don’t know. I honestly don’t know.”

“Tell us!”

“She got married. She married Littlefinger. And she’s bringing him here. Today. They’ll be here in an hour.”

They all stared at her.

“What is wrong with her?” Edmure sighed.

I’m that moment she knew exactly what they were going to do.

“Nothing is wrong with her, Ed, don’t say that! She’s just... desperate. She wants to be happy. It has been hard for her, I understand why she did this. And we have no right to tell her that it is bad for her, because she’s not a child. She needs to do things on her own. So we are going to smile and nod and be polite. No one is going to cause a scene. Do you understand?”

**Catelyn**

Everyone had arrived as they were supposed to and things actually went pretty smoothly for once. Some of the guests were chatting in the living room while they waited for the dinner to get ready, some had decided to help in the kitchen. The kids had finally came down from their rooms and were making small talk with the guests. It all just worked out. After a good hour or so of worrying about what would happen when Lysa came with Petyr, Catelyn was quite relieved when her sister and her new husband were polite and everyone else just rolled with it. And that was all she demanded of them. She had stayed away from Theon to avoid any talk about the earlier incident, she was still thinking about how she would avoid conversation with him for the rest of the night. She would come up with something. It would be fine. Maybe. She hoped so.

”Brandon, could you get me a thermometer?” Catelyn asked. ”It’s in the top drawer next to the fridge.”

She didn’t put much thought into exactly which drawer it was. And that would have some dire consequences. Which she would become aware of a few seconds later. Brandon suddenly got very quiet. And the rustle of papers could be heard in the kitchen.

”I thought you had just made it up, Lya” he said slowly.

”Made up what?” Catelyn asked.

She had his back to him, couldn’t see what it was he meant. She just kept on with what she was doing.

“Draw me like one of your Reach girls” Lyanna said and suddenly Catelyn understood exactly what Brandon had found.

Oh no. Oh fuck. They had forgot to move the sketches after she had put them in that drawer when she opened the door for Father and Brynden. It was happening again. Only this time it wasn’t her children that was looking at Catelyn’s very much naked body. It was her husband’s brother who also happened to be her ex. And she had a feeling of that Lysa had probably turned to see what it was because her sister let out a horrified gasp. That was definitely worse than Brandon. Lyanna had already seen it and she had already laughed at them, she wasn’t a problem. But Brandon and Lysa were. And perhaps Edmure too.

”Catelyn Tully!” Lysa said, sounding like she couldn’t believe what she was seeing. ”What is that?”

Tired. Catelyn was very tired. She was also blushing. And she prayed for that the gods would have mercy on her poor soul.

”That’s me displayed on various things in the house, but I have a feeling of that you had already figured that out” she said and turned towards Lysa.

”Gods be good! You are forty four, you should behave like an adult, not like that! You are responsible for children’s future and still you show yourself like that!” Lysa said outraged. ”Think of your children! They need a mother to take care of them, not a whore! What will become of them with such an irresponsible mother?”

Had Lysa just called her a whore? And an irresponsible mother?

”Calm down, Lysa!” Edmure said sharply. ”There’s no need to get upset.”

”I have my son in this house! I don’t want things like that to be hidden all over the place!”

Why was Catelyn the only one blamed for it? Why didn’t Lysa get angry at Ned? He was the one who had drawn it! Catelyn had just happily stripped naked and draped herself over different pieces of furniture knowing that if she got into the right position he would abandon his pen and fuck her senseless. And even if she had been alone in the creation of the sketches, Lysa couldn’t be mad at her for it. Lysa didn’t have the right to call her an irresponsible mother because she had an active sex life. Wasn’t Lysa really the irresponsible one of them? She had secretly married a man who did not love her, why wasn’t her son the child they were worried about? And he was thirteen, for gods’ sake, not exactly a small child completely unaware of what adults were doing.

”I’m perfectly aware of my age, it’s actually forty three, if anyone’s interested. And I assure you of that I’m not only forty three, but also a very capable mother and aunt. You don’t need to worry about any children of mine, or nephews of mine” Catelyn told Lysa. ”And you have no right to shame me for this. What I choose to do is none of your business, if I want to do that, then I’ll do that. It does in no way make me an irresponsible mother, so I’ll hear no more from you about this. Call me a whore one more time, and you can take your husband and drive home.”

Lysa got quiet after that, but she still looked very angry. Catelyn walked over to Brandon and took the papers from him. She looked down at them, the one on top was of her on one of the couches. She didn’t look bad at all on it... so that was always something.

”Will you get angry with me too?” Brandon asked.

”You had already seen everything there is to see but in considerably better shape, beloved brother-in-law. I looked a lot better before I aged more than twenty years and had five kids. As long as you don’t try to frame me as a bad mother, I have nothing to be angry about” she said calmly.

A wide grin spread on Brandon’s face and she just knew that he would say something stupid.

”Your legs are still great, Kitty Cat.”

Catelyn Tully Stark had her fair share of nicknames, but that one was undoubtedly her least favorite. She repressed the urge to slap him, she had a feeling of that Lysa would flame up once more if she did that. (That family is making you violent, Cat!). Brandon hadn’t changed that much since they dated all those years ago. And gods how happy she was for that she had married Ned and not him. But at least he hadn’t commented on her boobs. So maybe he had bettered himself a little. 

”You know what, Brandon? I’ll pretend you didn’t just call me ’Kitty Cat’ if you promise to never do it again and remember that your brother was also involved in this” she said.

Immediately something lit up in Brandon’s eyes and he turned to look at Ned, who gave Catelyn a look that could mean nothing but ’was that really necessary?’. Had he really thought that he would get away without anyone thinking about him? She wasn’t the only one involved and she wouldn’t let anyone act like she was. So she only smiled at her husband.

”How come I’ve known you all your life and didn’t know you could draw, little brother?” Brandon asked.

There was something in hearing someone call Ned ’little brother’ as if he wasn’t well past forty and a very serious man that made Catelyn very amused. Maybe because she happened to know that he absolutely hated it. She loved her husband with all her heart, but sometimes he absolutely needed to get teased by his siblings.

”I said the same thing!” Lyanna said and you could clearly hear the grin in her voice. ”Tell us, why didn’t we know about this talent of yours?”

If glares could kill, Lysa would have murdered all of them. She dried her hands on a towel and left the kitchen without saying a word.

”Should I go after her?” Edmure asked.

Catelyn didn’t worry, she knew her sister. Lysa just needed to calm down for a couple of minutes, she would be absolutely fine.

”Just give her a few minutes, she’ll be fine.”

”You didn’t answer the question, Eddard” Brandon said.

”I hate you both” Ned muttered.

”You love us and you know it” Lyanna laughed.

”Not even a little.”

”What’s the ruckus about? Why’s Lysa so upset?”

Benjen came into the room with a curious face. Catelyn was only glad it wasn’t her father. Or Petyr. As long as it wasn’t Father or Petyr she would be fine.

”Brandon found something of Ned and Cat’s that she didn’t like very much” Lyanna said, still smiling.

That was an understatement if Catelyn had ever heard one.

”Found something? What do you hide in your kitchen?” Benjen asked.

She wouldn’t actually show him the papers she held in her hand, those she would burn in the fireplace, but she had a feeling of that her secret was extremely out and that trying to keep it from him was pointless because someone would tell him soon enough. She suspected that Lyanna had already been spreading the tale. She and Ned had been outed and might as well make fun of it. The others would make fun of them and blushing and pretending it never happened wouldn’t do a thing about it. Laughing along until it died down was the best strategy if she knew the Tully-Stark family properly. Of course Theon would never let it go, but she had learned to handle Theon. It would be fine.

”Proof of that I would make an excellent nude model.”

If her career ever failed she could always fall back on that.

”Oh yeah, that would make her pretty mad. But jokes aside, what was it?” Benjen said.

Both Brandon and Lyanna erupted into laughter again.

”That wasn’t a joke!”

”Did you know that Ned is quite the artist?” Lyanna asked.

”No, I didn’t” Benjen replied. ”Why?”

”Because he made the proof of that Cat would make an excellent nude model” Brandon said.

Benjen looked utterly confused. It was actually very fun to see.

”How did you get to know? Did he tell you? Did he just take out a pen one day? Did you ask if he had any hidden talents? Did he ask you to model for him?” Lyanna said and looked at Catelyn.

”That is something I’ll keep to myself” she said.

It wasn’t sexual at all. She had just happened to find a little doodle he had made when she searched for something in his office. It had been a flower, if she remembered correctly. Perhaps a winter rose or something similar to that. Then it had evolved into what it was over the course of pretty many years.

”Come on! Please!”

“It’s none of your business, Lya” Ned said.

Lyanna pulled a face.

“Oohh, I’m Eddard Stark, everyone thinks I’m so proper and perfect but in reality I draw porn in my spare time” she said in a mocking voice.

“What are you? Twelve?” Ned asked in a very frustrated voice.

”I think it’s time to eat. Could everyone please carry something with them out to the dining room and someone call for the others?” Catelyn said.

She watched as all of them except for Ned took something and disappeared out to the dining room. With a sigh she leaned against the counter, just needing to breathe for a few seconds. That had not been part of how she had planned the evening. But she was a little disappointed in herself for believing that the night would be free from stuff like this.

Ned wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close to him. She rested her head against his shoulder and laid her arms around his waist. He was so warm, so real.

”We should have put more thought into where we put these” she said.

”One might have thought that a drawer in our bedroom was a safe place, but no” he said and she could hear the smile in his voice.

”We have to do better in the future. Even though we are so not hosting Christmas next year” she said.

”Lyanna should do it. I feel like she deserves it.”

She laughed and kissed him. One of his hands travelled up her back and into her hair. She really enjoyed the feeling of that. But she had to break away from him when a sudden thought came into her mind.

”Maybe we should move the handcuffs?” she whispered just to make sure no one else heard. ”So that we can avoid similar incidents for the rest of the night.”

”That’s probably a good idea” he replied.

”Yeah. Go sit down, I’ll do it right now before we forget. Tell them I’ll be down in just a minute. Oh, and you have lipstick on your face.”

Before she went upstairs she sneaked into the living room and put the drawings on the fire that crackled in the fireplace. She would help Ned make more later.

She didn’t know if she would be able to handle it if someone found the fluffy pink handcuffs. That was a part of her sex life that she really would prefer to keep from her family. And therefore it was a quite nasty surprise when she didn’t find them where she had put them. The children had not only found the handcuffs, they had moved them.

”Fuck” she sighed.

With increasing panic she searched through every drawer in the room, unable to find them. Where had they put them? She couldn’t exactly ask them. But it seemed like she wouldn’t ever find them again if she didn’t. How did she even got into that situation? She was an adult woman. And still she sat on her knees on the floor of her bedroom and searched her drawers for her handcuffs. She had to smile to herself, it was ridiculous. After a while she realized that they were probably waiting for her downstairs, she would have to leave it. For now. Oh gods. She took a deep breath and stood up again. It just wouldn’t stop. But with her family, she hadn’t really expected it to.

**Arya**

”Where do you have that wife of yours, Stark?” Uncle Edmure asked impatiently. ”I’m starving.”

”Edmure” Grandpa said sharply. ”Cat is your sister.”

It seemed like being told off by a parent never stopped, Arya reflected. She was squeezed in between Gendry and Bran, and she could barely move without bumping into one of them. She didn’t fully understand how all of her family fit around the table, but through some magic it worked. There was only a spot left for Mom, but she had disappeared. Arya wished she would just come already, she was, like Uncle Edmure, starving.

”She just went to grab something upstairs. She’ll be down in a minute” Dad told Edmure.

And just as he said that, Mom came into the room. It took Arya about a second to see the strict mom look on her face and she knew that one of them, or all of them, would get a good scolding. She also knew that this dinner would have an interesting start and suddenly she felt a little better about that she had to sit at the packed table for hours.

”Do you remember when you were little and we spoke of that you shouldn’t take other people’s things?” Mom asked, looking at Arya and her siblings in turns. ”That still applies, you know.”

”What have we stolen now, Mrs. Stark?” Theon asked, trying to look innocent.

He failed and Arya had to suppress a laugh at how ridiculous he looked. When she glanced at Gendry she could see that he was smiling slightly too. She knew what had been stolen, and she knew that Theon wasn’t even involved in it. She looked over at Aunt Lyanna, Uncle Edmure, and Mom’s Uncle Brynden, who just watched Mom with smug faces. Oh how happy she would be when her missing item turned up again.

”Oh nothing, I’m sure” Mom said and shrugged. ”I’m just reminding you. It’s a good thing to have in mind. And if you ever do steal something, return it. The owner will probably be very happy.”

”I bet the owner would be happy” the Blackfish said. “I’m sure she’s had lots of fun with it.”

Mom looked at them for a moment, her eyes narrowed with suspicion.

“Where are they?”

“I thought you said nothing had been stolen” Uncle Edmure said and shrugged.

“What have I done to deserve this?”

“I’m sure someone’ll find them soon enough” Aunt Lya smirked.

“I guess that ‘someone’ won’t be me” Mom sighed. “But I have a feeling of that I will have to explain the deep dark secrets of my marriage to whoever it is.”

“I don’t think those secrets are dark” the Blackfish chuckled. “I would bet good money on that they are very bright and fluffy.”

That made Edmure and Lyanna burst into laughter. Aunt Lysa coughed and glared at Mom. Arya glanced at her father. He looked very tired.

“First of all, this isn’t my fault” Mom told her sister. “Second of all, why do you hate me, Uncle?”

“I don’t hate you, Little Cat, I love you!”

She glared at him for a moment, but then she gave up and took her seat at the table. And they could finally start eating.

It was actually quite nice, despite that it was very crowded around the table. People were talking and laughing, the food was amazing. Gendry seemed to be having a good time too. Arya had been worried for him for a while, he had been sad and a bit distant. And he had refused to tell her why. But she hoped that he was getting better. She hated it when he was unhappy and she just wanted him to be well. He deserved that.

“You don’t get to judge me, you cheated on your boyfriend with his brother and got knocked up!”

Everyone got quiet and looked at Uncle Edmure. What? Why had he shouted that at Mom? Arya looked at her Mom. Saw her expression turn from surprised to angry.

“Kids, go upstairs!” Mom said firmly, not taking her eyes off her brother. “And no, Robb, I don’t care that you’re legally an adult. You’re going too.”

“Come on!” Robb sighed.

But he didn’t protest more than that. They all pushed out their chairs and walked out of the dining room in a line. Arya was last. And apparently they were all going to listen to her mother, they walked towards the stairs and began walking upstairs. Arya understood them, Mom was not a woman who you ignored, and certainly not while she was speaking in that voice. But Arya wanted to hear.

Just as she reached the stairs she grabbed Sansa’s arm.

“Let’s listen” she whispered.

For a second Sansa looked like she would scold her, but then she smiled.

“Yeah.”

Robb turned around.

“You’ll tell us later, won’t you?”

“Of course.”

Then he too disappeared up the stairs and Arya and Sansa sat at the bottom of them. It was quite dark, the only light came from the glowing embers in the fireplace and the lights in the Christmas tree, and they sat out of sight from the dining room. As long as they kept quiet no one would notice them.

Something in the tree caught Arya’s attention and when she realized what it was she had to put a hand over her mouth to stifle her laughter. The star at the top of the tree had been replaced with a pair of handcuffs. So that was where Brynden had put them after Uncle Edmure and Aunt Lya had taken them. They had found them together with the drawings earlier and told Aunt Lya about them when she asked more about it. She had found it absolutely hilarious and told Uncle Edmure, who had told the Blackfish. It was the Blackfish who had came up with the idea to actually take them.

Arya poked Sansa with her elbow and pointed. When Sansa noticed what she was pointing at her eyes went wide, but she actually smiled. She had reacted so dramatically to the drawings, but apparently she found that funny.

Arya was still a bit shocked over that none of her siblings seemed to have caught their parents at it when she had done it so many times. Once Gendry had been with her, that was undoubtedly her favorite time. She had learned to feel nothing about it, her parents had sex and that was definitely not the most horrible thing in the world even though her siblings seemed to think so.

“I cheated.” Arya got pulled out of her thoughts by her mother’s voice. “It’s not something I’m proud of and I don’t recommend doing it at all, but I did it. I have also been the person who was cheated on and that was what lead me to cheating in the first place. The reason I cheated wasn’t just that I was drunk and horny and slept with the first person who would have me. Brandon had cheated on me at least three times during our relationship of six months, and that hurt me, I was sad and angry and I felt like I wasn’t good enough. Because if I had been good enough for him, then he wouldn’t have cheated on me.

But Ned made me feel the opposite, I felt special and more than good enough, he made me feel happy. And so I slept with him, and the day after I went and broke up with Brandon because we were not working. It didn’t matter that I had slept with Ned, because we didn’t work before that. That’s the difference between my situation and your situation. You have a good thing, you and Roslin work together, she loves you so much, and you threw it away because you just could not keep it in your pants.”

It was completely quiet, she guessed everyone just stared at Uncle Edmure and Mom. What a Christmas. Arya got eye contact with Sansa who looked like she had just witnessed a murder. So that was why Mom preferred not to speak of when she got together with Dad. Arya had always found it weird, but there was the reason. She had cheated.

“Think of what you have done to Roslin” Mom then continued. “If you really do love her and truly regret what you did, then apologize to her, tell her how sorry you are for causing her that pain. But if you plan on doing it again, then let her leave you. Because having your partner cheat on you repeatedly completely ruins your self-confidence, speaking from experience. And it will completely break your trust. Seven hells, I still have trust issues because I chose to trust Brandon again and again, and still he lied to me and used that trust against me.

Maybe Roslin will realize what a poor excuse for a man you are and find herself a better one. Honestly, it’s what she deserves. She’s a fantastic person, she deserves someone who treats her right. And don’t you fucking dare try to hold my first pregnancy against me, because that was my eldest son. That was Robb. And I don’t regret anything.“

“You slept with him while we were still together?” Uncle Brandon asked.

Arya rolled her eyes. Of course that was what Uncle Brandon focused on. He was such a fucking idiot sometimes. When he drank too much he talked loudly of when he was together with Mom. Arya didn’t like it at all. When she was younger it had scared her, but as she grew older she just found it idiotic. It made Mom so uncomfortable every time, but Brandon never seemed to notice that. She remembered one Christmas, she had been maybe six or seven, when the Blackfish had punched her uncle for it.

“Guilty as charged” Mom said.

At least she was very honest, one had to give her that.

“Do we know he’s not mine?”

Arya had not even thought of that. How did they know for sure that Robb was their full sibling? She didn’t like the thought of that maybe he wasn’t. He had to be.

“Brandon, shut your mouth for once in your miserable life” Dad said coolly. “We know he’s not yours.”

She chose to believe that.

“This discussion is done. It’s been very many years, it doesn’t matter anymore” Mom then said.

Arya knew perfectly well that that tone meant that she wouldn’t say anything more about it. She had heard it very often. For some weird reason Mom never seemed to like anything Arya asked for.

Suddenly a sharp laughter could be heard. At first Arya thought it was her mother, but when the person spoke she heard that it was Aunt Lysa. Their voices could be very similar sometimes. Arya had never liked that.

“Except it does matter. You really shouldn’t be the one pointing when you have done the same thing.”

“Gods, you’re impossible. It wasn’t the same thing, Lysa. I have just explained it.”

“Look at you, Cat. Everyone thinks you’re so perfect and proper all the time, but you’re really just a cheating slut, aren’t you? Going after everything you want and then justifying it to everyone else.”

Holy fuck. Holy fucking fuck.

“Uhm, maybe we should go up to the others” Sansa whispered.

“Yeah.”

**Catelyn**

She had thought that they would have been able to talk about it like adults. It had been so many years, and it had never exactly been a secret. Everyone had sort of known because of Robb. Because he had been born exactly nine months after she broke up with Brandon and she and Ned had not officially gotten together until after he was born. They had just not talked about it. Everyone had simply acted like it had not happened.

The tabloids had not acted like it never happened though. The rumors of a supposed affair had spread like a fire, together with the speculations about whether or not Ned was actually Robb’s father. Ned, Brandon, and herself had made every headline. Apparently it had been a very big thing that the heirs to some of Westeros largest companies got into a mess like that. She had made more than a few headlines over the years, for a number of different reasons. And Lysa was definitely not the first person to call her a slut. Though she was thoroughly tired of it. She had been married for more than twenty years and she had been faithful all of those years. Even though people really wanted to believe otherwise.

She wished it had not hurt so much that her own sister had so close to calling her things like that. And in front of almost all of their family. But it did. When Lysa had called her a whore in the kitchen earlier she had been angry. Now it just hurt. She loved her sister. But sometimes it felt like Lysa didn’t love her. Why was she so angry with her all the time?

Catelyn waited for someone to say something, hoped that somebody, anybody, would come to her defense. But no one did. Everyone just sat in stunned silence. Even her husband, who was usually so quick to anger whenever anyone insulted her. And her uncle who had always told Lysa off when she was being unfair. Her father, her brother, Ned’s brothers and sister. She even glanced at Petyr, but he didn’t say more than the rest. Did they all agree with Lysa? Did they all think that she was just a cheating slut?

“Lysa, I want you out of my house as soon as possible. And I don’t want to see you again before you apologize.”

She pushed out her chair and left the dining room. The rest of the house was dark, and she didn’t know where to go. She ended up in the kitchen, staring out through the window. There was no one in the street. The only moving thing was the snow that fell from the sky and landed on the already white ground, the sight was illuminated by the street lights. She felt the tears burning in her eyes, tried to hold them back, failed. She really was quite a sight. Crying in her kitchen on Christmas.

For nine months they had not known if Robb was Ned’s or Brandon’s. Ned had promised her that it didn’t matter, that he would stay with her and take care of the baby no matter what. But Catelyn had felt that she needed to know. She had to know if she would force another man’s child upon Ned or if it was their baby. She had never known a greater relief than when the results told them that Ned was the father. And since then she had almost forgotten about the whole debacle.

“Cat?”

“What do you want, Petyr?” she sniffled and dried her tears with the back of her hands.

Catelyn didn’t want to talk, she had nothing to say to him. She just wanted Ned. She wanted Ned to come to her, wrap his arms around her and hold her close while he mumbled reassuring things into her hair.

“I’m just wondering if you want someone to talk to. My wife said a terrible thing. And she wasn’t right. Cat, you are a wonderful woman.”

She turned to face him.

“Thank you. But I think I just want to be alone for a bit. Go back to the others” she said with all the politeness that she could muster.

“Are you sure?” he asked in a low voice.

Suddenly she was aware of that he had moved towards her. She backed a few steps, kept her distance.

“Yes.”

He closed that distance again. Why couldn’t he just leave? She didn’t want to talk to him at all. She kept backing away until she hit a counter and couldn’t back anymore. He had her cornered.

“You’re so beautiful” Petyr said and she felt a shiver go down her spine when she saw how he looked at her.

She had always smiled at his clumsy advances, had always found them humorous and nothing more. Perhaps that had been a bit mean of her, but she had never actually thought it to be anything serious. In that moment though, in that moment she was afraid.   


He was so close to her that she could feel his breath on her face. He smelled of mint. She had always hated mint.

“And you’re too close” was all she could get out, as if that would stop him.

“I can never be close enough.”

His hands were on her and she wanted to fight, she had never wanted anything more in her entire life. But she couldn’t. She could just stand there, her body wouldn’t listen. She felt the panic rise in her, tried to get her body to work with her instead of against her, but it was frozen.

“Don’t touch me.”

“You want it. Deep down you have always wanted it.”

And then he kissed her. Roughly, like he didn’t at all care about what she felt. He probably didn’t. It was almost bearable if she just shut off her brain too. She tried to think of other things while she felt how he slipped a hand underneath her blouse. The grocery shopping for the next week, what meetings she would need to have with other companies when she and Ned came back to StarkCo after Christmas, when she could see Maege Mormont the next time.

“Get your hands off her, you fucking piece of shit!” someone shouted and suddenly Petyr was ripped away from her.

Catelyn’s whole body unfroze at once. Her legs were shaking and she could barely keep herself upright. She fell back and leaned against the counter, gasping for air. Unable to say anything, she just watched the scene before her.

Lyanna was screaming at Petyr, and suddenly more people ran into the room. Ned and Uncle Brynden, then Edmure and Benjen. Her father came limping in, leaning on his cane. Brandon came behind him.

“What happened here?” Hoster asked loudly.

What if they didn’t believe her? What if they thought that Petyr was another thing she had went after because she wanted it and was just lying to get out if it?

“I told him to leave me alone” she said quietly. “I told him not to touch me.”

She heard her voice break and felt the tears returning to her eyes. It was hard to look at them, so she turned her gaze to the floor. They had to believe her.

Hoster walked over to her surprisingly quickly for a man of his age and put his arms around her. She couldn’t even remember last time she had been held by her father that way, but it felt good. She buried her face in his shoulder, ignored everything else that went on in the room. She was vaguely aware of that Petyr was being dragged out of there and that Lysa had started screaming somewhere. But it didn’t matter. Dad was there, and he would protect her from everything.

“Little Cat” he said after a while. “What did he do to you?”

“He kissed me. And touched me. I told him to stop, I promise I did, I didn’t want him to do it.”

“Hush, sweet child. This is not your fault. None of it was your fault.”

He kissed the top of her head and held her tighter.

She didn’t know how long they stood there, but they did so until things felt a little bit more okay.

“Thank you, Dad” she said when she pulled away from her father.

“There is nothing to thank me for. You are my daughter, and no matter how old you get, I will always be here to comfort you when you need it.”

“I don’t want anyone to talk about it.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

**Lyanna**

Lysa and Littlefucker had been sent home. Lysa had refused to believe what her gross husband had done, even though Lyanna had told her what she had seen. She had not even asked how Catelyn was doing. She had just taken her husband and her son and left, outraged over that they could accuse Littlefucker of such a thing. He had denied it, of course, the slimy bastard, and Lysa had just swallowed his lie whole. Despite the fact that Catelyn was obviously very distressed.

Lyanna could feel herself shaking with anger just from thinking about it, but that was nothing compared to her brother. Ned was furious. Or, well, he had been furious before. At the moment he was just... silent. Worried, probably. At least that was how Lyanna interpreted it. He was sometimes very hard to read.

It was quiet in the living room. The kids had came running downstairs when they heard the shouting, then almost all of them had participated in the shouting at Littlefucker. Ned had at least succeeded with teaching his kids how to insult a creep. Gods, what a fucking idiot Petyr Baelish was.

Catelyn had reassured everyone of that she was fine, just a bit shaken. Lyanna wasn’t sure about how fine he sister-in-law actually was, because the woman had been physically shaking. But she had smiled. Then she had disappeared upstairs to fix up her makeup.

“And what have you done to the star?”

Everyone looked up simultaneously to see Catelyn standing at the top of the stairs. She was wearing the most hideous sweater Lyanna had ever seen. It went so badly with her hair that it was almost hard to look upon. Ned had really outdone himself, surely he had to win that year’s ugly Christmas sweater competition. Catelyn couldn’t top that. No one could ever top that.

“Isn’t the question what the hell you are wearing?” Lyanna asked. “You are a gorgeous woman, and at times I’m jealous of my brother, but seriously? What is that?”

Catelyn just smiled.

“Wait until you see the one I got for him. I’m going to win this year.”

She seemed very confident in that, but Lyanna doubted it. There was no chance of that she could have found something uglier.

“We are the judges of that!” Edmure called out.

“You can give him bonus points for the cat on the back, but I’m winning.”

“Show us the cat” Bran said.

She turned around, revealing a cat that was just as ugly as the rest of the sweater. She couldn’t possibly have found anything uglier than that, you could barely tell it was a cat.

“Are you sure it’s a cat?” Sansa asked and squinted at it. “Because calling it a cat is an insult to cats.”

“I know. The knowledge of that I share a name with that thing will destroy me one day. So thanks for that, darling.”

“You’re welcome. But you can’t beat the cat” Ned said. “Just admit it.”

He also seemed very confident in that he would win.

“I will beat the cat.”

Lyanna was curious to see what Catelyn had for her husband if she believed that she not only stood a chance, but would definitely win against the monstrous cat.

Then she walked down the rest of the stairs and over to the Christmas tree.

“So that’s where you decided to put them” she asked. “I was looking for them, no wonder I couldn’t find anything.”

Lyanna looked up at the top of the tree and burst out laughing. She had forgotten about the handcuffs after all that had happened. And it didn’t take long before the rest of the room had joined in on the laughter. Good thing Lysa and Littlefucker had left, they would have just completely ruined the mood.

Catelyn stood in the middle of it all and just shook her head. But she was smiling.

“Why were you looking for them?” the Blackfish asked, grinning.

“I was going to hide them so you wouldn’t get your filthy hands on–“

Suddenly Lyanna couldn’t see Catelyn. It took a moment for her to realize that she couldn’t see anything at all. It was completely dark. And completely silent. No one seemed to know what to do.

“What happened?” Rickon’s little voice called out.

“I knew it would happen” Catelyn sighed. “Fuck.”

“Language, dear” her husband responded.

Ned sounded very calm. Power outages happened sometimes, though it had been a few years since the last one. She guessed it was because of the heavy snowfall. It had been long since it last snowed that much.

“Ned, get the fire going again. The rest of you, stay still. I’ll search for some candles and flashlights. Gods, where did I put my phone? Has anyone seen it?”

“Is it the one with a blue phone case?” Benjen asked.

“Yeah.”

“It has no battery.”

Catelyn made some sort of very frustrated noise.

“You need to get better at charging your phone, Mom” Robb said.

“Nah, it’s fine. I actually know where to find flashlights, unlike some other people in this room.”

“Please, Mrs. Stark, don’t remind them of their trauma, we had to comfort them for an hour afterwards” Theon called out.

A smacking noise was heard, followed by laughter from Theon.

“I can’t believe I have five children and at least two of them turned out weak” Catelyn mumbled.

“You won’t survive the winter!” Rickon said.

“Well said, Little Wolf!” the Blackfish laughed.

After that people started talking and moving around the room, despite Catelyn’s directions. It was all very confused. Lyanna stayed right where she was, she was a little afraid of tripping over something or breaking a foot from banging it into a table. She was not quite as flexible and agile as her sister-in-law. Maybe she would have to take up modeling, it apparently kept your body at it’s best. Or maybe Catelyn just naturally aged very well.

After a few minutes Ned had managed to get a fire burning in the fireplace and the room was lit up by a pleasant glow. The chaos died down immediately and soon Catelyn came with her arms full of candles. She placed them out in the room and lit them.

Lyanna would have said it was cozy if it had not been her family that was in the room with her. They were all discussing a variety of things very loudly while at the same time stuffing their faces with candy. Hoster and Benjen were talking about when the power would be back on. Brandon and the kids were speculating about what the hell Catelyn had managed to find for Ned that could possibly be uglier than the hell cat. Ned and Cat stood in one corner of the room, talking in low voices. Cat seemed quite distressed, Ned just looked angry in his own cool way. Despite that Cat clutched one of his hands between the two of hers. They were almost the same height, Cat was just slightly shorter. She was tall.

Lyanna was also quite happy with her gift for Ned. Well, it was for Cat too. It had been very hard to come up with something for them, they already had everything. But Lyanna was pretty sure of that they had nothing like what she had made for them.

Catelyn quietly looked at Ned for a moment, then she just nodded and walked away from him.

“Jokes aside, where is the star?” she said. “I’m quite fond of it, it was a gift from my mother.”

“I don’t know, you’ll have to ask the Blackfish.”

Lyanna had been tasked with getting the handcuffs together with Edmure, she didn’t know where the Blackfish had put the star when she was upstairs searching.

“Uncle! Where is the star?”

The Blackfish looked up at his niece with a grin on his face.

“Do you not like our replacement?”

“I think you have misunderstood the purpose of them. Maybe you’re too old, do you want me to explain?” Catelyn countered.

“I’ve been in the game longer than you, Little Cat. I don’t need you to explain anything.”

“Ah, my mistake. I suppose you would know all about that. Considering what you were up to during my wedding party.”

They definitely sparked Lyanna’s curiosity.

“I didn’t mean to listen, but what exactly was he up to during your wedding party?” she asked.

“The mild version is that my dear uncle had sex in a bathroom during my wedding party and forgot to lock the door. Little did he know it was his future husband.”

Lyanna had to laugh.

“I also had sex in a bathroom during your wedding party. I didn’t marry the guy though.”

She couldn’t even remember who it was. She had been quite drunk. Well, everyone had been drunk at that party. What a party it had been. The future president had played the trumpet at that party. When she considered it, maybe it had been Robert Baratheon who had sex with her in a bathroom.

“So did I. Funny thing, my wedding party” Catelyn muttered. “Now, where’s the star?”

“It’s in that bookshelf.”

“Finally. Thank you. Was that really so hard?”

“You make it very hard for me.”

Catelyn just made a face at him and then she went to get the star. She pulled a chair over to the tree, took down the handcuffs and placed the star on top again.

Then she disappeared upstairs again, and came down empty handed. Lyanna couldn’t help but wonder where she had hidden the handcuffs. Surely she must have changed the spot, she wasn’t stupid enough to put them back in the same drawer.

“Should we open gifts?” she asked.

“Yes!” all five of her kids and some of their friends shouted.

“Go wild” she said and gestured towards the tree. “I want you to open your gift from me last, Ned.”

“Oh, I wonder what it could possibly be.”

“It’s your defeat.”

“I doubt it.”

“Just wait and see.”

“They’re surprisingly serious about this” Brandon said and leaned over towards her.

Lyanna didn’t find it surprising at all.

“I suppose the prize is good.”

“What do you think it is?”

Knowing Ned and Cat, it could be a variety of different things. If they even had a prize.

“I actually don’t know. I don’t think they have one. And if they have one, they’ve kept it very secret.”

“Ned! What’s the prize?” Brandon asked.

“We don’t have one. It’s just for fun.”

“Your wife doesn’t think so” Lyanna chuckled.

Catelyn was dead serious about it, one could easily tell.

“My wife is quite competitive.”

“I’m saying this with love, your wife is nuts.”

“My wife is crazy. But she’s cute.”

Catelyn had stopped playing board games with them because she was such a bad loser. She couldn’t take it. It was a miracle that Ned had managed to win three years in a row without it having serious consequences for his marriage. He had managed to beat her at monopoly through some miracle once and she had threatened with divorce. She also got a bit offended whenever someone said that she was a bad loser, proving further that she was a bad loser.

Catelyn came over to them with a gift in her hands. Lyanna’s gift.

“This one is for the both of us, love.”

“Oh, it’s from me” Lyanna said.

“We said no gifts, Lyanna!” Catelyn sighed. “I feel like we should be worried.”

“As long as you’re not afraid of your past you should be fine.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Just open it.”

Catelyn sat on the edge of a couch and gestured for Ned to come sit next to her. She carefully unwrapped the thing and in the end she sat with a photo album in her lap. She glanced suspiciously at Lyanna for a moment, then she opened it. And burst out laughing.

“You didn’t!” Ned exclaimed as his wife flipped through the pages.

“Yes, I did.”

“It can’t possibly be all of them” Catelyn mumbled.

“What is it?” Hoster called out from the other end of the room.

“It’s every news article we’ve been in!”

“Do you have a favorite?” Brandon asked.

Catelyn thought for a moment.

“I certainly had a lot of fun with the Jaime Lannister scandal, and that one didn’t affect the company. Yeah, that has to be my favorite.”

The thing was that there had been two Jaime Lannister scandals. Right after one another. First one for Cat, and then one for Ned. Catelyn had reacted to the news of Ned’s supposed affair by telling an obnoxious reporter that had been waiting for her outside the office building that her main problem with it was that Ned never let her have her affairs in peace. For some reason that had not been published.

“Your Jaime Lannister scandal or Ned’s?” Benjen chuckled.

“Definitely Ned’s. The press saw them leaving our office building at the same time exactly once and immediately jumped to conclusions. Gods, I love the press.”

“You hate the press” Ned said.

Catelyn almost weekly sat in her office and muttered about how she wished all of them would burn. But sure, yeah, she loved the press.

“One thing does not eliminate the other. Sometimes it’s very funny to see them guess wildly about our personal life and getting it all wrong.”

“Sometimes they score though, and that’s not very fun.”

“Regarding our life outside of the company they haven’t scored since they guessed that we would get married.”

“They did know that you hate cucumber” Lyanna said.

“I’m still losing sleep over that. How the fuck did they know that?” Catelyn said exasperated.

That had to be the most bizarre article Lyanna had ever read. Just a list over people who hated cucumbers. Very funny though. The employees had gone wild trying to figure out who told the press about Catelyn’s hatred of cucumbers. That had undoubtedly been the best week StarkCo had ever seen. Lots and lots of cats and cucumbers jokes. Someone even left specifically twenty six cucumbers on Catelyn’s desk.

“It haunts me that we’ll never know” Lyanna added.

“There was a car crash a few streets from here” Edmure said suddenly.

All of them looked up at him. He was reading something on his phone.

“None of you are driving home” Catelyn immediately said. “Don’t protest, I won’t let you leave until it’s light. Sleep here tonight, we have more than enough room to house all of you.”

“I gotta get home to Roslin” Edmure began.

“Did you hear me? You’ll do no good if you lie dead in a ditch somewhere. You’re staying.”

“You can’t tell me what to do!”

“You’re twelve years old, I can tell you what to do.”

“I’m just ten years younger than you!”

“Yes. Practically a baby. So listen to me.”

Catelyn had a way of talking to Edmure that made it seem like he was actually a baby. He only added to it himself, by sulking every time he didn’t like what she was saying.

“Now let Roslin know you’re staying the night because of current circumstances.”

“Hag.”

“Adulterer.”

Edmure didn’t answer to that, he just glared at Catelyn. But one thing was sure, her glare was better than his. After a few seconds he had to give up and walked out of the room with his phone in hand.

“Dad, your gift is the only one left” Arya said.

“Wait, what about yours from Theon?” Lyanna asked Catelyn.

A very relieved smile turned up on Catelyn’s face.

“Oh, it was a book about the history of Westeros. Thank the gods.”

Lyanna wouldn’t deny that she was a bit disappointed about that. She had trusted Theon to put on a show. Damn it. Now she only had Ned’s ugly sweater to look forward to. And the voting was always fun. After that she could maybe get Catelyn to play UNO. That would be very fun.

They all watched as Ned opened his present. Catelyn sat on the armrest of one couch, looking incredibly smug. And Lyanna had a feeling of that she probably would walk out of that fight a winner. Otherwise she would have looked at Ned like she was going to kill him.

And oh hells, she was right.

“Cat has my vote” Lyanna said as soon as Ned held up the sweater.

She couldn’t even find words for it. She had found words for the one Cat was wearing, she could not find words for the one Ned held.

“My eyes!” Sansa shouted.

“It’s terrible!” Theon said.

“Get that thing out of my sight” Hoster muttered.

Ned just looked at his wife, who smiled back at him so sweetly.

“Are you ready to give up?” she asked. “Or should we let them vote?”

They looked at each other, caught in some sort of mental battle no one could see. And then Ned sighed.

“Fine. You win.”

“Finally” Catelyn said. “And now, darling, you will go change. I won’t look like an idiot alone, we’re in this together.”

Ned grimaced. But he did as Catelyn told him. And when he was back, wearing the sweater from hell, Robb stood up and cleared his throat.

“Okay, now when all this is done. And both Mom and Dad look like idiots, as is tradition on Christmas, Jeyne and I have something we would like to announce.”

Everyone immediately got quiet, just looking at him, waiting for what he was going to say. Lyanna could have cut through the tension in the air with a knife. She noticed that Sansa exchanged a smile with her Jeyne. And she realized that they already knew. And when she looked at Jon she got a feeling of that he also knew what Robb was going to say.

“I proposed to Jeyne. And she said yes.”

Stunned silence filled the room for a moment.

“Congratulations” Catelyn said.

It sounded somewhat choked, and it took Lyanna a second to realize why.

“Mom, are you crying?” Robb asked with a raised eyebrow.

“No” she said as she tried to dry her tears with the sleeves of her sweater. “Okay, maybe a bit. But can you really blame me?”

Lyanna would probably cry like a little baby if Jon ever got engaged, she couldn’t blame Catelyn at all.

“When did you become such a softie?” Brandon chuckled.

“I’m not” she sniffled. “This is an exception.”

Catelyn was the first to pull her son into a long hug. After that she hugged Jeyne for just as long, if not longer. And then Ned had to comfort the crying mess that was his wife while everyone else congratulated the happy couple.

**Catelyn**

“This is a mess” Ned said and closed the door to the office.

“Oh it certainly is.”

Catelyn sat on the large couch and leaned back, closing her eyes for a moment. She felt Ned sitting down next to her and leaned against him as he laid an arm around her. She turned her face towards his and found his lips.

Ned’s soft kiss was a welcome change after Petyr. Ned was warm and gentle. Catelyn knew he loved her for her, she felt safe in his arms. Ned removed the feeling of Petyr’s hands and the taste of his lips, filled her with warmth and comfort.

“Next year we should just send all the kids away, and then we should throw a party for Christmas and get drunk” she said. “Or we could send all the kids away, and then we could not throw a party, and just have loads of sex instead.”

“The second option sounds rather nice” Ned said with a laugh. “I like the sound of it.”

“Or we could just do it next weekend.”

“Or now.”

Catelyn shook her head.

It wouldn’t have been a bad idea to end the day in the same way as they had started it, and she would have been for it if it had not been even more people in their home than it had been in the morning.

“If anyone hears a sound my uncle will keep taunting us until he dies. And then he’ll return as a ghost so that he can taunt us some more.”

“He’ll taunt us until he dies no matter what” Ned muttered and ran a hand through her hair.

Catelyn snorted. Uncle Brynden never seemed to become tired of his dirty remarks. That was something that had not changed in twenty three years, they had been there from day one and she couldn’t see it ending anytime soon. One of her biggest fears were that Uncle Brynden’s last words to her would be some sexual innuendo.

Ned pulled them down so that she laid on top of him with her head on his chest. He kissed the top of her head when she made herself comfortable against him, as she had done so many times before.

“Are you okay, Cat?”

She hesitated a moment. She didn’t want to think of it. She never wanted to think of that again. It had happened, yes, but she would rather live like it never had.

“I don’t have much to say. I was scared, I don’t know what would have happened if Lyanna had not gotten him away from me. But, yes, I’m okay. I promise you that, my love.”

Ned was probably furious. But he was staying calm for her sake. And she was deeply grateful for that. Just the thought of how he had been just after it happened made her shiver.

“Please tell me if there’s anything I can do for you.”

“You can do exactly what you are doing right now. Stay with me, love me, be my husband. That makes everything better. And you can tell me a story.”

“I’m not good at telling stories.”

“I don’t care if it’s a good story. Just tell me one.”

She had always found her husband’s voice to be something very relaxing. And the gods knew that her mind needed a bit of soothing.

“Okay, I have a story. And it’s a very good story.”

“Tell me.”

“It takes place twenty three years ago. I was at a party, Robert had dragged me there and I was quite miserable. I have never been one for crowded rooms and music.”

She just smiled. She knew that story already, better than anyone. But she liked it very well. And she could help telling it.

“I didn’t want to be there either. Cersei took me there. I do well in crowded rooms, but that night I wasn’t feeling it. I was upset over Brandon, if I remember correctly. But when I was there I accidentally ran into this man who I found very interesting.”

Ned chuckled.

“I almost knocked over the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Her hair had the most amazing color, and one could drown in her eyes. I would have left after twenty minutes if it had not been for her.”

“And then I pulled him outside so that I could smoke, thank the gods I stopped with that terrible habit. And we talked, and I found that I could listen to him talking for the rest of my life, I couldn’t have enough of him.”

She was glad Brandon had kept her from his family. If she had known that they were brothers she never would have slept with Ned and she wouldn’t have had the life she had. At the time she had been quite angry about it though, but she had had no idea where that would take her.

“She was more than just a pretty face, she had very interesting things to say despite being very drunk. Though she held her liquor surprisingly well.”

“I admit to being drunk, but he was also drunk. And he kissed me. That was even better than talking, kissing him felt very good.”

He caught her lips in a firm kiss and she eagerly opened her mouth for him. She wanted him. She really wanted him. Maybe if they locked the door and made sure to be quiet. Everyone were making their sleeping spots ready, surely no one would notice if they took some time to themselves.

Suddenly the door creaked open and Catelyn pulled away from Ned. She couldn’t see who it was because the person was pointing at her face with a flashlight. They pushed themselves so that they were sitting up next to each other. She just wanted to have some time with her husband, was that too much to ask for? Well, clearly it was.

“There you are!”

Ah, Edmure.

“Yes, here we are.”

She raised a hand to cover her eyes from the bright light.

“Before I say anything else, you’re disgusting and I feel bad for your kids.”

She had thought that he would get over stuff like that after he married. He had not. Poor Roslin.

“You know, that’s what you get if you invade people’s privacy” Ned responded.

All of their siblings liked to invade other people’s privacy. Especially their privacy.

“Edmure, can you please point your flashlight somewhere else, you’re gonna make me even blinder than I already am.”

“Catelyn, you have perfect eyesight” he said as he directed it elsewhere.

“That’s where you’re wrong, little brother. I wear contact lenses. You see, I’m past forty, which means I’m on death’s doorstep and my eyesight is very much not what it has been.”

At least she felt like she was on death’s doorstep. When she was so old that her eyesight was getting bad she was practically dying. And she wasn't even that old. Her eyesight had just decided to abandon the ship early.  


“Wait, so those glasses on your bedside table are real glasses?”

She didn’t like the sound of that. Did she even want to know what he had thought they were for? Probably not. Gods, what had gone wrong with her siblings?

“Yes, they are. It makes me worried that you thought they were not.”

Edmure only laughed.

“I think I can be forgiven for that considering everything else that can be found in your bedroom.”

“There’s a difference between the handcuffs and those glasses. They’re not very seductive. And I feel old when I wear them. Ned, be quiet if you know what’s good for you.”

Ned stayed quiet, but she knew what he would have said if she had not told him to be quiet. He did absolutely not find her very old. Perhaps because he was even older. Not by much, but it was still fact that he was older than her.

“What did you want to say, Edmure?” Ned asked impatiently.

She felt how he laid one arm around her waist.

“We are all having goodnight cookies and hot chocolate now, if you want to join us.”

“Come on. No sugar before bed, that’s parenting 101” Catelyn said and smiled.

“Good thing I’m not a parent yet. And that it’s your kids, not mine.”

Edmure turned and walked away, and the room became dark again. She looked at Ned, but could only make out the shape of him. She reached up to his face and turned it towards her so that she could kiss him. She desperately wanted to kiss him.

“Kiss me again” she whispered.

“Will you put your glasses on if I do?”

“I’m gonna put on my glasses because I’ve been wearing my contact lenses for way too long and my eyes are irritated, not because you kiss me. Feel free to kiss me anyway though.”

And so he did. He kissed her until they were both gasping for air. She pulled away from him, cupping his face. She was desperate for him, but at least one of them had to be downstairs before the rest of them started talking. She just had to wait until they went to bed.

“You go downstairs. I’ll be with you soon.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to call Roslin.”

“Okay. Is this where you ask to borrow my phone because yours is out of battery?”

She smiled and cupped his face.

“Yes. Please.”

“It’s downstairs, I’ll go get it for you.”

“You’re the best.”

She leaned back once more as she waited for Ned to come back. Hoped that Roslin would answer. It was quite late, after all, maybe she had already gone to bed. But Catelyn had to talk to her. She couldn’t believe that Edmure had done that to his wife. It was awful. Roslin deserved so much better than having the father of her baby cheat on her.

“Here you go” Ned came inside and handed her the phone.

“Thank you, darling. I don’t know how long this will take, but I won’t rush it. We’re done when we’re done.”

“Of course.”

He leaned down and kissed the top of her head. Then he left again.

She hesitated a moment before she put in Roslin’s number. And then she hesitated again before she pressed the call button.

Three signals passed and then a tired voice answered.

“This is Roslin.”

“Hi, Roslin, it’s Cat.”

“Oh, hi, Cat. Whose phone are you calling from? I didn’t recognize the number.”

“Ned’s. Mine is out of battery, I’m so bad at charging it and now I can’t because of the power outage.”

“Yeah, do you know when the power will be back on? Or when you can get out of there?”

“Unfortunately not. We know nothing. They’ll probably be able to go home in the morning when it’s light. I just didn’t want them driving in the dark when it’s snowing so much. I’m sorry for that.”

“Don’t apologize. I just wanted to know, Ed didn’t say much.”

“About that, I’m so sorry for Edmure.”

Roslin went quiet then, and Catelyn thought that she could hear her sister-in-law sniffling. Something squeezed Catelyn’s heart in her chest. She knew what Roslin was feeling. And she knew how terrible it was. She could feel tears rising in her eyes as she stared out into the dark office and tried not to cry. She had to comfort Roslin.

“I... I don’t know what to say. I never thought he would do that” Roslin almost whispered. “And I don’t know why. Is it because I’m getting fat and ugly, or because I’m tired all the time or does he just find me boring?”

She could hear the desperation in Roslin’s voice. How many times had she not asked herself those questions? What was so wrong with her that Brandon had to meet other women? Though it was even worse for Roslin. Brandon had not been her husband, and she had never carried a child of his.

“Listen to me, Roslin. It has nothing to do with you. It’s not your fault. Never believe that it’s your fault, never blame yourself. This is entirely on Edmure. Do you hear me? This is entirely on Edmure.”

Roslin sniffed again.

“Really?”

“It isn’t your fault. You have done nothing wrong. My brother is an ass, and you owe him nothing. You don’t have to accept any apologies he might have came crawling with, you don’t owe him anything. What he did was unforgivable.”

“At first I was really angry. I wanted a divorce. But now I just feel terrible. The thing is that I love him, really much. And I want us to be together. I want us to raise our little girl together. So I think I’m gonna stay with him, but I don’t know if I can ever trust him again.”

“I know how you feel. And I support you, no matter what you want to do.”

“What? Has Ned cheated on you?”

“No. But his brother did.”

“You dated Brandon?”

Wow. Roslin had actually managed to escape all those headlines despite the hatred her father had for Catelyn’s family. Maybe she was just too young to remember. But no, that resurfaced every few years when the tabloids had nothing else to write about and wanted to poke at her marriage. Too bad they always failed.

“Yes. I dated Brandon before I met Ned. He cheated on me three times that I know of, but it was probably more than that. I met Ned at a party and had sex with him, I wasn’t aware of that he was my boyfriend’s brother. That was when I got pregnant with Robb.”

“So you cheated too?”

“Barely. Me and Brandon were basically over by then, we just hadn’t said the words yet. I did it because I felt neglected and unloved. I was in a shitty relationship and suddenly someone found me interesting and looked at me like I was the most beautiful woman in the world. So I slept with him. And then I had his baby and married him.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

Roslin laughed.

“Looking at you two it’s very hard to believe that. You seem so perfect all the time.”

“Nothing is perfect, Roslin.”

“I know. Well, I don’t feel neglected. Edmure still loves me, and I love him.”

“That’s good. I want you to be happy, Roslin.”

“Thank you.”

“How about you come over here without Edmure sometime next week? I haven’t seen you in a while, I miss you. And I have a box of chocolate with your name on it.”

“Now that is an offer I absolutely cannot refuse. That would be lovely, thank you so much. How about Saturday?”

She could hear the smile in Roslin’s voice then and that made her feel a lot better.

“Saturday sounds perfect” she said.

“Great. I think I need to sleep now. The baby will barely let me rest, but she’s still now, so I’m going to take advantage of it.”

“You do that. Take care of yourself, I’ll see you on Saturday.”

“Bye, Cat!”

“Bye.”

After Roslin hung up Catelyn had to just sit and think for a moment. Her brother was a lucky man. Catelyn would have kicked him out with his head first if she had been Roslin. Or not. If Ned had done it, how would she have reacted? What would she have done? She didn’t know. She genuinely had no idea. They had been together for so long. What was she supposed to do if he just chose to throw it all away?

“Now this won’t do, Catelyn” she said out loud to herself after a while.

It would never happen, so why sit and brood over it while almost all of her family were having fun downstairs? No reason at, she had to pull herself together.

She pushed herself up and walked out of the office, closing the door behind her. Then she went into the bathroom so that she could take out her lenses. Once she had her glasses on she stared at herself in the mirror. She looked so old. How could Ned like it so much when she looked so old? She was old.

“Well, this won’t do either.”

She found all of them on the floor. Well, except for her father. He sat in an armchair. They sat in front of the fireplace with mugs and plates full of cookies. And for once all of them were quiet. For a moment she thought something had happened, but they looked just fine. At peace, even.

Ned looked up at her and smiled. He raised a hand towards her and she trotted down the rest of the stairs, took his hand and sat next to him. She scooted at close to him as possible and rested her head against his shoulder.

“What are you doing?” she whispered.

“I don’t know, they were like this when I came down.”

It felt like some obscure cult. Maybe it would have been normal if it had not been her family. They were never still and quiet.

“We are taking in the moment” Lyanna hissed. “So be quiet.”

“What?”

“You heard her, be quiet!” Bran said irritated.

It was all very strange. Or some sort of Christmas miracle. Catelyn couldn’t really make up her mind.

“Merry Christmas, Cat” Ned mumbled into her hair.

“Merry Christmas, Ned.”

“Shut up!”

“Okay, why are we even taking in the moment?” Catelyn asked, very much done with whatever they were doing.

“Because I’m gonna make you play UNO with me soon and we are enjoying the calm before the storm” Lyanna told her with a smile.

Were they all on the floor to mock her? Couldn’t they leave her alone for ten minutes? They all started to get up as Lyanna had said that, smiling to themselves and going back to what they had been doing before. She hated her family sometimes. They were willing to so very far for things like that.

“Oh fuck you.”

“Does that mean you will play UNO with me?”

She wouldn’t say no to a chance of destroying her sister-in-law and anyone else willing to play.

“I’m not only going to play, I’m going to beat you.”

“Bring it on. Ned, will you play with us?”

Ned laughed.

“Absolutely not. I have to share a bed with her, I won’t risk anything.”

Catelyn rolled her eyes. She wasn’t that much of a bad loser, everyone was just exaggerating. And she couldn’t even count from support from her husband.

“As if you’re risking anything, you don’t have a chance” she muttered.

“I’ll play!” Brandon said.

“Count me in” the Blackfish said.

“Anyone else?” Lyanna asked. “No? Cowards. I’ll go get the cards.”

“Have you ever won over her in anything? She’s scary!” Edmure said.

“Oh come on!” Catelyn exclaimed. “Can’t you play with me, little brother? Please.”

“I haven’t played anything with you since we were kids, and there’s a good reason for that.”

An hour and a half later she had beaten them all multiple times. They had taken turns trying to defeat her. Bran had come quite close once, and she had almost lost to Satin twice. Even Benjen managed to give her quite a challenge. But in the end she walked out of it as the champion. And Lyanna was losing her mind over it, because “HOW CAN YOU WIN AT UNO THAT MANY TIMES IN A ROW? IT’S LITERALLY A GAME BASED ON LUCK AND CHANCE”. Catelyn did feel very lucky.

And even later, when she laid in bed with Ned’s arms around her, she thought that despite everything it had been a very merry Christmas after all. And Robb’s engagement. Oh gods, he was engaged.

“I can’t believe he’s engaged” she whispered to Ned.

“No. It’s hard to believe that he’s old enough to get married.”

When she was Robb’s age she had already had one child. And still she couldn’t comprehend that he was old enough to get married. He was her son, her baby boy. Though she was happy for him. Very happy. She could feel her eyes watering just from the thought of it. She couldn’t even imagine what a mess she would be at the actual wedding.

“We were so young, and I’m only starting to realize it now. When our kids are starting to grow up. I mean, our oldest can have kids of his own before we’re even fifty.”

Robb and Jeyne would probably wait a bit with having children, but still. She did feel terribly old sometimes, but she actually wasn’t that old. Definitely too young to have grandchildren.

“Do you regret it?” Ned asked.

“Not at all. I wouldn’t want to live my life any other way. I’m just thinking.”

“It’s been a long day. Maybe you should sleep now and think more tomorrow.”

“Yes. I love you.”

“I love you too.”


End file.
